Tammy

Moving

Posted on September 7, 2012October 3, 2012 by Tammy

Since the UHaul is in the driveway…..I guess that means this move is really happening. Not sure exactly how we are pulling this one off (there were a few moments that I doubted we could) but, most of the truck is loaded, the house is almost empty and the goodbyes have started.

We have averaged a move every 2.5 years that we have been married so you would think that I am a pro at this moving thing. Somehow each time I forget how much work it is. I have decided that each additional child makes that difficulty rate rise!! I must admit, the four child difficulty level is evened out by not moving internationally. I was so thankful not to be required to fit all that my family needs into eight suitcases that weigh under 50 lbs each. I have done it before. It is a very good exercise in helping me to simplify my life, but not an easy task.

For this move there was less organization and more raking junk into boxes. I strapped Little Man onto my back and did the best I could. I can’t believe how much stuff we have gathered over the past two years. Shocking and disturbing! The big kids have all been great helpers and done a good job at entertaining themselves and their new brother. I have amazing children!

For Little Monkey this is the first move since joining our family. She is taking it hard, feeling very unsettled and claiming she is staying in KY. A new brother (displacing her from the spot as youngest) and a move all in the same month is a lot for any 5 year old.

Sad to say that Big Girl and Soccer Dude are taking the move in a stride. Big Girl is so focused on her new little brother I sometimes wonder if she knows we are moving. For Soccer Dude – he has moved so many times he shrugs it off. I was shocked when he told his buddy today – “have a good life.” In his mind good-byes are final. I can see his point. Last time he said goodbye to his best friends (one from Denmark, one from Canada and one from the US) – well we haven’t seen 2 of them again and who knows if we will. The hard part of being a MK.

We so appreciate all your prayers and support during this month of crazy transitions. We couldn’t have done it without all of you. The encouraging emails, phone calls, help with moving, kids and food…..I really will never be able to repay it all. It is humbling. So thankful for Christian community.

Cleaning tomorrow and then the UHaul pulls out Sunday. I better go get some sleep. Signing off for now – next time from Florida.

Look who is two!

Posted on September 2, 2012September 2, 2012 by Tammy

It was an answer to prayer that we were with our Little Man to celebrate his 2nd birthday today. There were many times during the adoption process that I doubted my baby would be in my arms by September. Thank you Jesus for sparing me the pain of missing this milestone. He probably wouldn’t have known any different. Like any 2 year old, he treated it like just another day. He was confused by the wrapped gifts, ate his ice cream with gusto, and didn’t really take note of the extra attention. (Heck, all the toys in our house still feel new to him and he still is surprised at every meal by what we set before him. Today seemed like any other surprising day in his new life.)

For me today marks the beginning of a lifetime of celebrations. I vow to be behind my camera cheering on my boy from here on out. I have missed his first tooth, first birthday, first word – I don’t intend on missing anything else. If I have my way the blank pages in the photo album marking the first two years of his life will not reflect the days to come. It is a new year. We are putting hard beginnings behind us and looking forward to memories created together.

Today at church when I stood up front sharing the communion devotion a little voice was calling from the congregation. “Ma! Ma!” The same little boy took off down the church hallway, stopped and turned to make sure I was following him. My gifts on his birthday. It might not seem like a big deal to others – but for a momma praying and hoping for bonding and asking God to heal a young grieving heart, these two simple acts mark a significant beginning.

He is ready to claim me as much as I am ready to be there for him.

Once he figured out it was made of ice cream….he decided to dig in.

He also wasn’t so sure about the little car we got him.

Big sisters to the rescue. They showed him how to get around on it and fun was had by all!

Hurricane Isaac lives at my house!

Posted on August 29, 2012 by Tammy

Seriously, I am mom to the most snuggly baby in the world. Our Little Man loves to be held, wraps his arms tightly and buries his face into the deep places of your neck. I can’t resist him when he comes running on his knees saying, “MA” with his hands held up. Love, love having another little one around.

Yet, Adjusting to life with a baby after taking a five year break….well it has created a bit of chaos in my world. It feels like a hurricane has hit our house as I relearn how to be a mom to a baby. TWICE I have totally forgotten the diaper bag. Maybe the nice smelly surprise that was deposited at Walmart will keep me from forgetting in the future. (I dropped and ran. Maybe I will make it to Walmart tomorrow….with the diaper bag!) Now I remember why I didn’t carry a purse for so many years. Move over cute black shoulder bag – enters in bulky diaper bag with my wallet and keys somewhere towards the bottom.

So it is taking me some time to adjust. But Little Man – he has jumped right in as if he has always been a part of the crew. Where are the food issues? Isn’t he supposed to be crazy difficult in the nights? Maybe the other shoe will drop – but for now we are enjoying one happy, easy, outgoing, loving baby.

We are trying to stay close to home this week and get to know each other. There is a lot to learn. Daily it seems we are seeing another side of his personality and figuring out this little guy. We have missed out on almost two years of his development and it takes some work to catch up. For now we are rejoicing with every “first” that we experience with him. Proud of him for figuring out how to use a fork. Loved seeing him play basketball with dad and big brother and we are constantly laughing over his antics to entertain us and keep up with the big kids. (We totally need to figure out a walker or ride toy that can give his poor knees a break. You wouldn’t believe the work out he is giving them running after the other kids!)

He has gone to church with us. (Waved to everyone and acted as if it was his job to greet everyone at the door. Perfect PK.) The pool took him a few minutes, but he warmed up quickly to splashing with the big kids. We need to teach the boy how to swim soon because he didn’t like needing to stay so close to mom.

All in all a great first week. Makes me think that we could add two more. If they are all this sweet and easy……

Hubbie says – “he has the perfect personality for a youngest.” 😉

Home Sweet Home

Posted on August 24, 2012August 25, 2012 by Tammy

All four kiddos are tucked in bed….all here, in this house, all together. Could it get better than this?! Ahhhh. I am one content momma. How could I not be after a sweet day (day one of all six of us together)?

Spent the day watching the antics of the big kids who are desperate to win over Little Man. Somehow they have not realized that he already adores them and laughs at their every move! He belly laughed at Soccer Dude who was showing him how to do a header with the soccer ball. Not to be out done Big Girl followed him around all day meeting his every whim. “It is like the baby I have always wanted!” She declared. God did grant her the desires of her heart by providing us a little guy who loves being spoiled, carried and entertained. We will see how long this lasts.

Now, when it came time for the park he was all about going up and down the slide on his own. Swings not so much. Daddy finally was able to convince him to give it a try. He sure is becoming a daddy’s boy. See the sweet telling photo below.

Our very active 2 year old is totally more fun at the park then he is on an airplane for 16 hours. We managed – actually I can’t complain. We had very few meltdowns (talking about myself here!) None of us slept well. Little Man really does like to sleep on his back with his arms flung over his head….not really possible in my lap in a small seat on an airplane. We tossed and turned. He uses his short leg like a lever to raise himself up. Smart when he is trying to get around – painful in mums gut when used to try to get comfortable in his sleep.

We might just need to name the short leg “lever” much better then stump, nub, short leg or even hook don’t you think? 😉 Yes, I realize this could cause a few people to be offended. Learning to laugh with, be endearing and embrace rather than be offended by all the staring has made us rethink what is offensive. Thought the staring would end when we left China. Not so much. Parents you should tell your kids not to point and whisper loudly. Just come out and ask if he is missing his foot. Then we can say yes, introduce you to Lever and all be friends! Ohhh, that was like a post within a post all for free!

Enough for tonight, I should give in to jetlag and and go to bed. (Jetlag is evil. Twice within 14 days is pure torture!)

First a few photos from day one as six.

The bond is close – looking at dad and trusting him on that scary swing.

Welcome to the life of 4 children….couldn’t get them all to smile, look or wipe the silly faces off. Must say I was laughing pretty hard!

Forever Grateful

Posted on August 22, 2012 by Tammy

One woman changed the life of my son. A woman who saw him as an infant with potential – a child who could thrive and live life to its fullest.

Every orphanage has a budget which makes for some difficult decisions by the orphanage director. Medical care costs money. Which child if given medical care will get better? Paperwork costs money. Which child if gotten paper ready would be adopted? The orphanage director in Maoming saw a sick child who would need several surgeries and leg braces and thought – he is worth that investment. When she looked at her budget and chose which children to prepare for adoption she looked at our boy and thought – a family will surely choose him.

Forever I will be in her debt.

Two beggars sit outside the hotel we have been staying in while completing our paperwork. One is missing his leg and the other has severally clubbed feet. Every time I walk by them I feel like weeping. If the orphanage director had not seen the potential in Isaac that is what could have become of him. Instead our Little Man is packed and ready to start his new life in the States.

The orphanage director handed me a thick book of photos, medical files and x-rays, gifts from the nannies and asked me for my email address. “Would we send photos of Xunxun as he grows?” I assured her we would and promised to send her a video of him walking. Tears flooded her eyes as she shook my hand.

I am not sure that I could ever tell her “thank you” in a way that would convey how deeply I feel in debt to this woman. But, as I stood there looking into the eyes of the director – we both understood. We are two women who have seen something amazing in this boy and know that he is worth it all.

Adoption update: Today they handed us the last of all of our documents. IT IS FINISHED!! We are now packed up and ready for the journey home. In a few short hours we will board the plane and start Little Man’s new life as part of a family.

On the move

Posted on August 19, 2012 by Tammy

We are the proud parents of a very active almost 2 year old. I did not think that was the case 2 days ago (the active part not the proud part.) The first few days with us he was content to sit in our arms or to sit on the floor and play with the wooden blocks or train cars we brought with us.

We caught a glimpse of how fast he could move while playing in the hotel’s playroom. I went inside the play castle at Little Monkey’s bidding and Little Man did not like that one bit. He took off on his knees. Man was I thankful for the small castle window that gave me the first peek at the mobility of my youngest son! I really would have assumed that little fairies had picked him up and moved him if I hadn’t witnessed his knee ~~walk~~ run myself.

Then he caught sight of me……and froze.

That is when I got the clue of how smart and mischievous my new son is!

Game on.

Today – he was pushing the stroller around the hotel room (with Little Monkey inside), pulling out all the plugs from the wall, swiping down anything within reach from the desk and end table – and that was just while I was trying to get him ready for bed! (I haven’t even mentioned how he took off naked when I turned my back from a diaper change. He then proceeded to pee on the floor and clap for himself. Hubbie’s comment to the round spot on the carpet. “That’s my boy!” No help there!!!)

If I had a dollar for every look of pity Little Man gets while we are out and about – I would have enough money to adopt another sweet child! Actually I would like to pay a lot of people to see what I see. This is not someone to pity. He is an amazing boy who has overcome so much and is learning to achieve great things in spit of limitations. It would do us all some good to work hard to overcome.

To the man in the market today who said “you are very good hearted people” I say – Actually I feel a bit selfish. I have the treasure and blessing of being this man’s mom all to myself. I am the blessed one. For some reason God is giving me a front row seat to see one of his miracles in action. How blessed am I? (Blessed and a bit tired. He is fast!)

Adoption update: We got through Little Man’s medical check-up (needed to enter the States), have filled out a bagillion more pieces of paperwork and now we we wait. Monday we should have his passport. Wednesday we visit the consulate to finalize everything so we can head for home!

Here are a few photos from the last two days.

A day filled with treasures

Posted on August 17, 2012August 17, 2012 by Tammy

Today we were able to experience what in my wildest dreams I did not think possible. Traveling a few hours outside of the city we were able to get to know our little man on a whole new level by visiting his stomping grounds. There is no greater gift then seeing where he slept, played and grew these past two years. We took tons of photos and just tried to soak it all in.

The memory from today that this mom will treasure in my heart for years to come…..

We walked down the street toward the little park where they took him to play. As we walked the neighbors flooded down into the street. They called his name and congratulated him as we walked by. One old woman said, “So you are off to America!” Another wanted to know if he was excited to ride an airplane. Yet another wanted to let his new momma know that “he is a really big eater!” It warmed my heart to see how loved he is. After spending several days in GZ where he gets starred at, pointed at and we get weird glances, (seriously had a young couple trip because they were starring at his leg rather than watching where they were walking in the restaurant tonight!) these old women helped my attitude.

I expected the day to be hard on our little guy – confusing at best. He just met his new family 5 days ago and now to confront his old world again?! Not sure I would have pushed to do it if I hadn’t had the experience with Little Monkey. There are so many questions that she has about her first 4 years of life – all of which I can’t answer. We have few photos and even less information. The treasure I was given today for Little Man is immeasurable. Anyway, I expected tears and maybe even a big old two year old fit when it was time to leave. Boy did he surprise us. The whole day he went from old arms to new arms as if he understood the importance of goodbyes and embracing his new future. Sounds impossible I know, but kids who have had hard beginnings have “old souls” and understand things that never should be understood at such tender ages.

After today’s visit it feels real. I have had him in my arms for several days. The documents are in my file folder to prove that he is now my son – but there is something about a good goodbye. Closure.

We celebrated a great day with McDonalds for dinner. He ate 3 chicken nuggets and french fries – the only American food he has been interested in thus far. I guess he was ready to embrace his new beginning too!

Getting to know him!

Posted on August 16, 2012August 17, 2012 by Tammy

Jetlag is kicking our tails (or should I say Little Monkey’s jetlag is kicking my tail!) So this post is late in coming. I fell asleep with the kids the last two nights in a row! 😉

Day 3 and 4 with little man have been a bit slower. We had to go to the police station to apply for Isaac’s passport that we will be able to pick up in a few days. Other than that we have been able to hang out and get to know each other better. He really is starting to come out of his shell more and more each day. He finally said something – ball in chinese and his name. We were excited to hear his little voice. Since he has been so silent we thought #4 was going to be a mild meek silent one that our family has been lacking. Then we Skyped big brother and sister. He heard them calling his Chinese name and he went nuts – talking up a storm. We have no idea what he was saying, but he sure wanted to tell them something. Can’t wait to get all 4 of these kiddos together!

We have been so blown away by all of the support, encouragement and prayers we have received during this process. Thank you so much for standing with us. Feeling the love!

Till tomorrow (or the next time I am awake.)